Houston Rockets Daily Rocket Science – OH NO, WE SUCK AGAIN
By Chris Stanley
OH NO IT’S TRUE WE SUCK AGAIN EVERYTHING I TYPED FROM FRIDAY IS NULL AND VOID BECAUSE THE HOUSTON ROCKETS ARE A COMPLETE AND TOTAL MESS.
I’M TYPING THIS ARTICLE IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE I CAN NO LONGER CONTAIN MY PANIC BECAUSE THE ROCKETS LOST TWICE THIS WEEKEND TO TEAMS WHO ARE SUPPOSED TO BE OF LOTTERY QUALITY.
OH LORD IT’S HARD TO BE RATIONAL EVEN WHEN THERE ARE 72 GAMES LEFT IN THE SEASON BUT WHAT’S ON THE COURT RIGHT NOW MAKES ME WANT TO HEAD FOR THE HILLS AND START STICKING STRICTLY TO COLLEGE BASKETBALL – OH GOD WHY HAVE YOU DONE THIS TO ME.
AFTER ALL OF THE OFFSEASON HYPE AND PATIENTLY WAITING THIS IS WHAT I GET? I KEEP ON TRYING TO CONVINCE MYSELF THIS IS LIKE LEBRON’S FIRST YEAR WITH THE HEAT AND THEY STARTED 9-8 AND EVERYONE PANICKED BUT THIS SEEMS SO MUCH WORSE.
TAKE A LOOK BELOW, IT WILL REENFORCE EVERYTHING I’VE SAID AND THOUGHT ABOUT THESE MISERABLE ROCKETS AND DON’T EVEN THINK I’M TAKING THE PHONE BOOK OFF THE ALL CAPS BUTTON.
HOUSTON ROCKETS DAILY NEWS AND NOTES FROM AROUND THE WEB
DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY WATCHING THE ROCKETS IS SO PUTRID THIS YEAR? THERE ARE FIVE REASONS LISTED BELOW AND THEY ALL MAKE SENSE, SO IF YOU ARE STILL IN DENIAL READ IT AND WEEP.
Why Watching James Harden and These Rockets is Unbearable [The Dream Shake – Eric Nielsen]
"But, James isn’t only deferring because Lawson is in the game. He’s deferring because he can’t shoot. James is shooting 38% from the field and a horrific 24% from three. Though he is still shooting ten of them a game. Again, it’s live or die with James. Last year was acceptable, though this year it may not be. James hasn’t been getting the calls like last year and he’s frustrated. The ball will fall (please?) but when?"
ARE YOU STILL IN DENIAL? OH, I GUESS YOU NEED SOME NUMBERS TO BACK THINGS UP – SO HERE ARE SOME NUMBERS TO BACK THINGS UP. THESE ARE VERY, VERY, VERY BAD NUMBERS AND IF THEY DON’T MAKE YOU PANIC I DON’T KNOW WHAT ELSE WILL.
James Harden and the Houston Rockets have an effort problem [CBS NBA – Matt Moore]
"Those problems come on the defensive end. Houston’s defense last season, largely without Howard due to injury, was terrific. That was the formula for their success. They defended with efficiency, ground the games to a pulp, and then James Harden’s individual brilliance carried them home. That’s gone this year, and it’s gone in a myriad of troubling ways."
ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED WITH THE SHEER PANIC OF THE AWFULNESS? THERE IS TOO MUCH EVIDENCE NOT TO PANIC EVEN THE NORMALLY COOL CALVIN WATKINS IS WORRIED ABOUT THINGS, JUST TAKE A LOOK FOR YOURSELF.
Rockets lose again — is it time to panic? [ESPN NBA – Calvin Watkins]
"Last season, en route to a 56-win campaign, the Rockets didn’t lose three consecutive games until the Western Conference Finals. They’ve done that twice in the first three weeks of this season."
I KNOW I’VE BEEN PILING ON ABOUT ALL THE BAD STUFF SO HERE’S SOMETHING TO TRY AND LIFT YOUR SPIRITS. IT DIDN’T WORK FOR ME BUT MAYBE YOU’RE MORE RATIONAL THAN I AM – JESUS THIS IS NOT OKAY HOW AM I GOING TO FUNCTION AT WORK?
Houston Rockets: Grading Player Contracts [Space City Scoop – Andre Cantalogo]
"This article will argue in favor or not in regards to decisions concerning the players extensions for the 2016-2017 season when there will be money flowing. I’ll also grade Clutch City’s deals as to whether they represent good NBA value or offer potential solutions for freeing up space to utilize in next year’s free agency period."
Next: Houston Rockets Send Sam Dekker to Rio Grande Valley Vipers
GO OUT INTO YOUR DAY AND TRY NOT TO LET THE PANIC BOTHER YOU – OH WHO AM I KIDDING? ALL HOPE IS LOST IT’S TIME TO ABANDON SHIP GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN. THE TOYOTA CENTER IS BURNING AND ALL WE CAN DO IS WATCH IT SLOWLY CRUMBLE TO MISSING THE PLAYOFFS.
EVERYONE MAKE LIKE HOGWARTS AND SCREAM